The Vinyl Test

Making wise choices while being pulled in a million different directions

Picture the scene:

You are back home from the record store, beaming with excitement, when you suddenly hear that dreaded question:

Another record, honey?

No, it’s not your partner.

It’s you. It’s your own voice as you notice your shelves are more packed than your local mall on Christmas Eve.

Do I even have room for this?

And thus the vinyl tetris game begins…

Photo by Belinda Fewings on Unsplash

There comes a point in the life of every vinyl collector when we start questioning our choices.

I’m not talking about our music choices, although we know these may change or become more refined as our tastes and lives evolve.

It’s our vinyl choices I’d like to focus on today—the records we decide to own versus those which should stay in the streaming realm.

Scarce resources

Lack of space, changes in your financial circumstances and time constraints will all impact your priorities.

Even if you are lucky enough to win the lottery and move to a huge castle, you won’t be able to beat death. Our time in this world is limited, no matter the size of our houses or bank accounts.

Space, money and time: the real masters of your collection.

Photo by Ryan Arnst on Unsplash

Decisions, decisions, decisions

When I started collecting vinyl, I wanted to own as many records as possible.

I didn’t buy blindly, but I was, admittedly, a bit generous with what I considered worthy of owning in wax.

Like most other collectors, though, I routinely applied the usual filters: records that really stood out, no skips, barely a weak track, etc.

But it wasn’t enough.

I’m now approaching the 600-record mark, and while my collection is still growing (albeit at a slower pace), I realise there are some records I don’t actually need which are, naturally, taking up precious vinyl space.

Over the years, I’ve developed and perfected my own vinyl test to help refine my choices. It works a treat, so I thought I’d share it with you today.

The test

Before buying a record, I ask myself these questions:

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Is it emotionally compelling?

If new, how obsessed am I with it? If old, what memories does it bring back? Was it foundational and/or character building? Has it rearranged my head in any way?

Is it musically or culturally significant?

Is it iconic in a way I find meaningful? Is it ground-breaking? Did it pave the way for other sounds I also enjoy? Was it a turning point for an artist or genre I follow?

Will it enhance or add value to my collection?

Is it an addition to a certain discography I aim to complete? Or will it help expand my collection to genres or sounds I said I wanted to explore more?

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For each of the three questions, I add one point for each affirmative answer:

3 points: definitely worth getting

2 points: definitely worth considering

1 point: not bad, but is there any other record that would score more?

0 points: easy, tiger… don’t get ahead of yourself!

You can adapt the questions and/or the score system to your circumstances. For me, this is a very effective way of addressing emotion, cultural impact, and purpose… all in a matter of seconds.

Photo by Friso Baaij on Unsplash

Cultural significance explained

Going back to my questions, while the first and third are self-explanatory, I feel the second deserves some explanation.

Cultural significance can be seen as more objective than your feelings or your specific goals, but remember: not all cultural impact or significance will resonate with every collector in the same way.

In other words, I believe our subjectivity should play an important role here as well.

For example, I don’t deny that Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake or Schubert’s string quartets are culturally significant, and arguably more relevant —on an objective level— than most of my favourite records. To be frank, though, I just don’t connect with this music as much as I connect with soul, blues or R&B.

And there’s no point bullshitting ourselves.

So, for a soul and neo-soul lover like myself, Sam Cooke’s Ain’t That Good News, Aretha Franklin’s I Never Loved A Man The Way I Love You, Marvin Gaye’s What’s Going On, Maxwell’s Urban Hang Suite, and Mariah Carey’s Butterfly, to name just a few, are a million times more culturally significant, in my heart of hearts, than any classical piece you may put in front of me.

I can think of many other examples in these and other categories, and I am sure you can do the same with your favourite genres.

When it comes to your collection, what’s relevant to you as a music lover on an emotional, cultural and pactical level should carry more weight than what a thousand critics or experts may have to say.

Do you have your own vinyl test to guide your choices? Do you agree that some records will feel more culturally significant or relevant to each of us depending on what we like most?

Let me know your thoughts in the comments.

Thanks for reading/listening. Happy spinning!